I envy you

Those were the exact words my dad said to me two nights ago. Picture it right, its just the two of us at the dining table, my sister was out at church if i'm not mistaken. Anyway, i sat down to keep him company more than anything, i'm not the biggest fan of sitting a dining tables because it gives way to uncomfortable discussions and plastic pleasantries. So he's there eating away when he turns around and asks me about college etc. Then he turns around out of the blue and was like "you know i envy you. if i had half of what you have now when i was younger, i probably would have been worse than you are" Basically saying that my non chalant attitude towards academics and life in general doesnt rub him the right way and that i expect things to be handed to me without working hard for any of it-which is kind of true, but i wasnt going to give him the pleasure of knowing he was right. Then he flipped the conversation round to talk about my best friend scott. Know he's a very upstanding person, you know the type-accomplished, high up in his job, expects everything to be done HIS way etc etc. And my sister is exactly like him, in character at least...but to make it worse she's gotten real religious over the years. In a roundabout way, she skates for Jesus REAL HARD!

So yeah he was going on about how he heard scott has a, and i quote, "great influence over [my] life". Which is bullshit, because at the end of the day if someone asks me to do something, and unles's i want to do it, i won't do said thing. but in his eyes, if scott says jump i ask "how high?". He then went on to say that i seem to be more into alcohol and abusive substances than i let on and that i;m a different person at home than i am outside. He's one to talk, considering for as long as i've known him he's treated us his family differently than he'd treat other people...thats another days post ALL together so i'll shut up about that. But in relation to my 'abusive' nature i'll say this. I have no evil designs, i'm a well intentioned meaningful person. I'm young and i'm not particularly headstrong (though i can get pretty pissed). I'm a good person and nothing he can say can undo that!s. As usual he's based his assumptions on second hand information. So after going back and forth telling me the dangers of said abusive nature i zoned out, which is kind of sad becasue he said some really resonating things that i could have passed onto my children-you know in that "i remember when my dad used to say" way. So after going on and on like the diplomat that he is, he turned around and point blank called scott a scumbag! Then apologised ever so eloquently, but then repeated how he's scum and an evil influence and how i should disassociate myself from him seeing as if you show someone the company a man keeps, you can tell alot about his character. I'm really sorry for going on and on but ever since tuesday i've been really pissed off about this and i cant just let him have the last word! I've to go to the village he grew up in for a wedding this weekend, and its like a 2 hour drive down so i'll probably address him then-shame its just the two of us going, that'll make for an uncomfortable drive.

In other news, i'm out with my sisters ex boyfriend today. I forgot how nice he was, considering how i kind of hated him when he went out with my sister. I've this weird habit of being best friends with my sisters ex's ONLY when she's broken up with them. Anyway, i'm sittin in his office now and he's doing pretty well for himself for doing nothing...ah the joys of nepotism. Anywho, i'm off for now so i'll catch you later

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